Friday, April 17, 2009

How to get laid off

I actually sat down and did a proposal detailing the cost benefits of the early severance to present to the boss when he returns from overseas. I even did all the math, which included fractions and their conversion into decimals.

I am proud of myself. My least favourite subject since the second grade has been math. I think it was due to the fact that fractions came after the first grade why I aced math before then. It has been downhill thereafter. Until now. I calculated how they could save well over $60,000 USD by letting me go early and I would even give them a bligh in lieu of payment for a few months of gratuity.

Thanks so much Mr. Smith from Campion College (my high school alma mater) who, though dubbing me "Commando Zero" for my prowess in failing tests, actually passed on just enough formulae to take me through life, and hopefully this time, out of a sticky situation.

Getting the logistics in my head is half the battle won. Getting it into a concrete argument on paper pushed up the fraction of success to 3/4. Now, convincing them to take the damn deal may just be 1/4 but its it is the heaviest portion of the whole.

Now I am talking fractions. Mr. Smith would be proud.


Anonymous said...

take your time. one day at a time. remember life has return journeys...and the world is tiny.

Azikiwe said...

Math was probably your least favourite because most jamaican teachers never taught you how to learn and appreciate subject matter via real life situations until this is addressed many brilliant persons such as you will be FAILED by the shitsem ...

Sheer Almshouse said...

I dont know who posted that anonymous message but I suppose that person is not aware of how long I have been here, inspite of every desire to flee. I have been here longer than I worked at JPS for crying out loud! Anyway, the world is indeed a small place... but this here is a whole new world all unto itself and far removed from reality. I want no part of this. I have done my time. I have paid my dues. I am unhappy and I am leaving. Clearly, if I were rash, I would have left the day I found out that the public water catchment area was in between the cemetary and the city dump.

K...I have been saying that for years. If only they had given me problem that started with ..." A young college graduate decides to buy a car for X dollars on a starting salary of .... Calculate the compound interest..."

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