So what is "self-sabotaging?"
It is the deliberate attempt to undermine one's own success, knowingly or unknowingly.
Last night I had a burger after having a very clean day, eating a wide array of nutrient filled foods. However, I missed a meal and therein started the problem.
I missed lunch. So after having dinner at a friend's (and even making my own cauliflower rice instead of eating the white rice that was supplied with meal), I had to pick up ESC at 1:00am. I didn't realize I was hungry while I was at home, but got very hungry while we were driving back. The hunger descended fast and furiously and I just had to eat. He suggested that I have burger king without the buns. That made me want the buns even more. I had a huge burger along with diet soda. I did not order the fries.
Essentially, I am eating a lot of salads and staying away from grains for now, so technically, I could have bought one of the salads that they offered. But the issue is that when I get very ravenous, my mind already has a picture of what it takes to fill me up. Clearly, that picture needs to be replaced. When I am not famished, I make better food choices and can say no to things that I know will not do my body any good.
Now that I have written it down and made a confession, I pat myself on the back for having the courage to break away from bad habits.
I remember a time 10 years ago when I didn't eat fast food and I worked out 3-4 days weekly in the gym. I had lost my taste for fast food and ate pretty well. Then my ex took me to McDonald's for breakfast when I visited him in NY (so lame - I should have walked away then) and the past 10 years have since been a roller coaster. I am not blaming anybody else but me... I am just recounting my history.
Since then, fast junk food and fries have come to be comfort foods intead of the healthy alternatives I had before. This can no longer be the case.
I refuse to be my own enemy. I will be my best friend. I will replace bad habits with good and remove unhealthy crutches from my life for good.
I would also like to note that I worked out 4x this week my first week back in the saddle and I will work up to 5x weekly by next week.
Affirmations:
- When I am famished, I will now seek a salad first.
- I will only use fast food joints when absolutely necessary and I will only order salads and grilled foods.
- I will get better at taking my health and fitness in my hands and building the intestinal fortitude to select healthy choices even when I feel stressed (like holding out until I reach home).
- I am replacing my comfort food image with that of a salad. I feel better after eating a salad. My conscience is free after eating a salad. I will walk around with a sachet of a healthy vinaigrette that I like at all times so that I can enjoy even a fast food salad without their unhealthy dressings.
- I will make lunch before I leave the house even if expect to be home before lunchtime.
- I will keep my house stacked with half prepped whole foods (like cooked seafood and meat to toss into a salad).
- I will eat on time, every time, no matter what.
- I will approach eating with the same discipline I would if my doctor had given me strict warnings of an impending life-threatening ailment.
- I deserve better.
- I come first.
- I will I will get better at this and I will reach my goals.
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