Thursday, July 16, 2009

Be anxious for nothing

I have not had a moment's rest since I have been home. Yes I have slept, and yes it is good to be here, but somehow, it seems like I have only had sporadic doses of peace.

I know that something is up in the spiritual realm... because these battles are too regular to be coincidental. I don't believe in coincidence anyway, I believe in purpose and divine order.

So what could be divine about having my grandmother's drunken neighbour crash into the passenger door of Imelda's one year old car which was parked on her driveway and completely off the road? And what could be divine about my two youngest siblings struggling through school even though they are both far from dumb? And what on earth could be divine about a cell phone going missing in minutes this morning all because I woke up to no water and rushed to get a shower at ESC mom's house before dance class?

The irony is that I came home just so I could have a simple, uncomplicated period before my biggest step ever and I have come smack dab into more seemingly ordered chaos.

There is a lesson in here somewhere, and that I am certain of... but is it too much to ask for a break from lessons? Can't I just get a summer holiday? Can't I just bee free to just enjoy my very limited time here?

And it certainly doesnt help that my mind keeps re-playing all this stuff and I am just on edge as it relates to the damage on the car, the missing cell phone, the siblings in distress and yadda yadda yadda.

I am going to have to quote scripture to myself again. To my restless spirit:

"Be anxious for nothing but in everything, by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving make your requests known to God. And the peace of God which surpasses all comprehension will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus"

I have been a worry wart ever since I was little... it's time to give up that trait. Something's GOTTA give.


Anonymous said...

You know... my first thought was to tell you to continue to meditate. Pray and do some yoga.

You are possible dealing w/ "aftershocks" from all the chaos from 'Behind God's Back'?!

You have had a traumatic experience ...correction: experiences. You know these things take time. Time to heal, time to move forward and hopefully soon forget.

If you think about all the strange things happening around you it will stress you out.

So continue to dance, pray, write, laugh, love. Let go and let God.

Love & hugs,

Sheer Almshouse said...

You know, I think you are perfectly right. I have had a LOT to deal with in a short space of time... and I may have some pent up stuff that's making me a little angry.

Azikiwe said...

...i agree with Anony.---"the aftershocks" ,have you in spiritual gymnastics... spending more time on that farm with just animals & nature and technology may help...

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