To the exes...

Even the baby agrees :)

My Personal Chef

Purple violets

Today I found a old friend.

Cultural divide

Fat" has no negative connotation for my country granny. Chicken fat to fry in, pork fat to corn and put in ackee and salt fish and Woman Fat mean seh life gree wid har and Man Fat mean to say him content. Down to cow get fatten before slaughter house. Now "Mawga" (meagre) is not a good thing. Tall, tall.

A dose of almost married life

I woke up this morning to the most awful smell of a digestive system in crisis. It literally woke me up. I got online and asked Imelda exactly what tea purifies noxious emissions.

"Welcome to married life," said she.

She suggested ginger, cinnamon and cloves. I haven't got cloves yet but I have the previous two.

The funny thing is that as a result, I end up having the most beautiful natural perfume in the home (and tea to cleanse ESC). My fave used to be mixed spice and ginger with orange peel for when I had company, but i think just the cinnamon and ginger will do... especially since it also makes a delicious tea!

This may be too much info for the faint of heart... but hey... I am only just being real. That said, I still love him anyway. And you know what? Everyday he loves just a little bit more. I can feel it. It oozes out of him.

We are blessed. And favoured. Highly.

The morning after the night before

Thank you all for all the love!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I don't ever do mush here but thought I would post that pic for you ;)

After a late morning, vigorous frolicking, shopping, chatting, planning and a 2hour grocery spree... I am exhausted. It's past midnight and Mr. Mention has gone biking to return to cook. We are having a friend over. This is a city that truly never sleeps :)

I realise that housework has got to be done everyday. Don't ask me how come I have just made that discovery at 29 years of age. Living with no man for all but one of my adult years meant that domestic duties would be done when the mood hit or when company was expected. Sharing a small space with someone means that there are things that must be done everyday. He helps, but due to his really awful hours, I try to leave very little up to him. But there are things that are assigned to him, off course. This is the 21st century, not the middle ages. I do not do floors and I do not do toilets. I will sweep floors and disinfect toilets but bowl cleaning is not my cup of tea. He is also the designated "ironer." He takes out the trash but that is just an unspoken agreement. I do everything else and then on top of that, look pretty.

But I do fancy taking care of him. And I am trying to balance taking care of me in the process. The funny thing is that where I slack off on the latter, he intervenes. Kari is not drinking enough water in the desert- Kari's water is always poured. Kari wont make salads but needs to eat greens until a juicer can be bought- Kari's salads are made. Kari didn't feel like cooking dinner only for herself so hasn't eaten- Kari's dinner is cooked at 1am. Don't worry, I usually don't get into bed before 4.

We went grocery shopping together this evening. I must admit that it is one of the simple pleasures of finally being with ESC long term. He knows what fish is fresh and to grab the fruits from the back... that frees me up to do other things. Plus, there is nothing nicer than having a manly man to carry the bags. Of course I offer to take the lighter ones.

We wanted to go to a movie but decided on two bottles of wine instead. We are down to a very strict budget. We went heavy on the grocery shopping because it will be the last big shopping for the next two months. The only things we will get from here on are fruits and veggies and the odd ingredient for a particular recipe. We do have a wedding-though modest-to save for.

There are so many costs associated with my arrival from everything like internet and new mobile service to getting cotton wool and alcohol. Don't men need alcohol and cotton wool? In addition to that, there is the fact that we needed to pay hefty fees for the wedding ceremony and the registration of the marriage. We also have to budget for the filing of my spousal visa thereafter. So yes, money tight- very. But our cupboards and hearts are full.

I got new running shoes tonight and proper walking slippers. Imelda, I settled for a muted bronzish metallic Birkenstock. I walk to the mall a lot and I needed sensible sandals instead of pretty(which is all I previously owned). I also got new cushioned running shoes because I need to get back to working out and they were RIDICULOUSLY cheap. Roughly USD$35. But that is the only steal I have found because things are REALLY expensive here. Azikiwe, I finally got New Balance... and you were right.. all of these years. Can't believe it took me 10 years to even try one on! No they are not as cute as my previous fave Adidas Adiprene but they are absolutely fantastic for comfort! Am I learning a lesson here?

Anyway.. I might as well be comfortable for now because you damn sure I wearing heels on my wedding day. Speaking of which... let me jump off and start my event spreadsheet. It may be small but the event planner in me just cant leave it up to chance.

A wedding for Sheer Almshouse

It's official. The date is set. Marriage counselling attended. Church booked. Tears shed. October 14, 2009. Dubai.

Yes, ESC and I are really getting married.

West Meets East

This is where I went yesterday... and what I did... with my brand new sistren. This is she. This is not a pose. I don't like posey posey photography. My style is to catch being being themselves. No posing necessary.

Landed, fetted and pampered

I know I have been MIA. I have been really missing the action we've had. But I have been topping up with ESC... we've had a LOT of catching up to do.

He found me a friend... so I have a girlie girl to hang with...

I was sick over the weekend and he nursed me back to health... ginger tea, chopped garlic, chicken soup, papaya and freshly squeezed carrot juice. The soup and tea were his idea and Mother Hen told me to use the garlic for the stomach cramping.

He comes home late at night... close to 2am most times... and if I am hungry, he will cook me something. Yes he is spoiling me, why shouldn't he?

I came from the airport to scented tea candles and fresh flowers in the apartment... really a lovely way to be welcomed.

I try to get up with him in the mornings to get him breakfast or at least pack it before he leaves and run an aromatherapy bath for him at night.

He calls me several times a day to check up on me even though I know he is busy.

He took me to a romantic dinner in his restaurant and I had the BEST restaurant experience of my life. I can see why they were voted Best Steakhouse in Dubai. We ordered 2 courses and got about 7. I am really feeling the benefits of being with a chef. His team went all out to give me a culinary experience worthy of an epicurean goddess. And yes, Wagyu beef does really melt in your mouth.

He has lost a lot of weight and is looking fabulous. Can you believe dude goes for a bike ride even at the hour he comes in? No complaints here. I am feeling the benefits. Was rather cute when we were at dinner and a British expat literally gawked at how gorgeous he was as she sat in disbelief because she couldn't believe that he was the chef behind the fab food she was having. Of course I blushed too. Gawk yah gal... he's mine. Plus I don't want anything that no one else wants. He was looking dandy in a shirt I bought him... and he cleaned up so much that his waiting staff didn't recognize him until he walked into the kitchen at the end of our meal.

We came home and played music for each other and danced and danced and danced.

So the consensus is that yes, it was damn well worth waiting for. Here's to a lifetime of such sheer bliss. We broke but we happy.

Day of Departure

I slept for all of 90mins last night. I am all organised and ready to go.

Ticket printed: check
Visa printed: check
Travel ins printed: check
Bags packed: check
Room tidied: check
Book packed: check
iPod charged: check
I just need to remember to pack my makeup once I put it on.

So this is it, after 9 long months, I see ESC in about 20 hrs.

So long from New York. Dubai here I come!

Here's to the end of nakedness in the streets (humbug).

I miss my peeps already.

The preparation of the bride

Nothing could stop me, not even fatigue. I had only come in at 6 in the morning after hours of shooting a major reggae concert in Queens (Irie Jamboree) and then going to a Guyanese Soca fete in Brooklyn to ensure the greasing up of waistline that had become stiff due to lack of use. I was too tired to go on Eastern Parkway to shoot the traditional West Indian Labour Day carnival parade, but nothing, I repeat nothing could stop me from going to grab a few things on Labour Day sale that would have otherwise been out of my reach.

I knew what I needed to get. After not seeing your man for nine months, what would you get? Damn right!

First stop: Fredericks of Hollywood. Second: Victoria's Secret. Getting Negliglee for $9 and a full buster/garter set for under $30 sounds as sweet a treat to me as Imelda's famous fruit cake.

I have always admired the bustier sets but thought them a lil to raunchy for my taste, but how could I turn them down at that price? These things sell for much more on a regular day. Since I was already in the territory, I picked up fishnet stockings with the seam in the back...hey... when monkey waan wear trousers, himhave to know where to put him tail. To top it off, I discovered a closing sale at Aldo's in Manhattan to complete the get up. Put it this way, when my friend Johnathan Ambrose saw them in my shopping bag he declares "Whoa..those are some serious CFM shoes!" I smiled. That's the point isn't it?

I got sweet smelling things for cheap at Bath and Body down to a nice pillow mist.

I am taking my small dutchpot (dutch oven) and a bag of Jamaican seasoning, down to pimento from my daddy's farm. Yes, I covering all bases.

This reminds me of the naughty boys in my high school class who used to go around proclaiming the 3 or 4 Fs of getting girls:

1. Find them
2. Friend them
3. F them

and for the disgusting ones:
4. Forget them

There is certainly no forgetting on ESC's part with all the things I have planned. Point is, as much as there are still LOTS of uncertainties and challenges ahead of us, we might as spend the meantime doing meaningful things.

So I will modify that old F thing from the perspective of a woman in a relationship:

1. Feed him
2. F him
3. Fall into blissful slumber

Mehod: Do steps 1-3. Bathe and repeat everyday and twice on Saturdays.


Until then, I am going to get back to packing. I leave NY tomorrow. Next stop, Dubai.

Pressure ease up

ESC and I had a nice long talk last night. Oh the difference one conversation makes. Yes him call me for what is likely to be our last conversation until we meet.

Helped to put things into perspective.

Or maybe it was just the reality of sex on the horizon. I can honestly understand why doctors in the middle ages treated "hysteria" with orgasms. Nothing more unstable and miserable than a woman who aint getting none. Well... OK I may be speaking for myself :)

Apparently my visa has come through. Haven't seen it yet though. I suppose I will see it on Sunday when he goes back to work (and has email access).

I need to get myself in the framework of a Fri and Sat weekend and Sunday being the beginning of the work week.

BTW, in a totally unrelated topic, I am officially, painfully lactose intolerant. Gotta run!

6 Days for sex!

Oh ye churchy innocents, listen and learn:

Sheer Almshouse: 6 Days for sex!

Denza: That sounds like a best seller :) LOL
rest on the 7th

SA: Hello, that was for God after 6 full days of work.... No sabbath till applicable

Denza: LOL
mind u mek the man erupt like volcano

SA: that is expected
otherwise him have plenty fi explain

Denza: LOL

Nothing lasts forever

I managed to slash a hole in the watermelon sometime between last night and this morning. The pressure is easing. Turns out a diary entry was all I needed. It's amazing how we sometimes possess the simplest solutions to the biggest of problems.

Fuck Mr. Murphy. Que sera, sera.

Watermelon

I have a huge watermelon in my chest... and everyday...water seems to fatten it.

Everywhere you step, macka juk you

(No matter which direction you turn, there are trees with prickles all about).

I picked a fine time to be out of a regular income... I must be crazy some may have thought. Indeed I was. Just not the way you think.

I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. Depression had taken me to places I had never been before and never want to return. This wasn't just about me not being able to handle pressure. I was ill. I was ill because I was overcome with fear due to two personal acts of violence committed against me in a foreign country, in which no one could be identified as friend or defender. I was alone and in fear for my life... and sanity.

So I did what I thought would be the most practical thing... leave. It was a choice between preserving life and sanity or making money. Each was at the expense of the other. They were mutually exclusive.

Having never been rich, it wasn't hard for me to select poverty.

Putting fun and jokes aside, I made contingencies, trying to account for the huge financial fallout. ESC and I also decided that it would be good for me to join him where part he be.

As the date draws near for my transatlantic departure, I seem to be getting more and more nervous. It's a humongous step- all of 13hrs worth- and a whole lot of uncertainties lie in between.

What on earth could I be nervous about? Nothing I haven't already contemplated and tried to make contingencies for, but that never stopped Mr. Murphy.

I am struggling, really struggling to find centre and stay grounded... after all... is my life not ordered by Higher Order? But these damn voices wont stop yapping in my head.

The Road Not Taken

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I--
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference

...Robert Frost