The fat lady's song

I just came across a blog that brought me back to reality, That's the Way Life is is a testimony of just how short and unpredictable life can be.

The question is: why am I staying here and making myself unhappy? Yes I want to save some money and to maintain an income in harsh financial times, but what if, just what if I am wasting what could be the best years in my life?

Money may or may not come, but time, once dispensed, cannot be recalled.

I am not happy here. Have never been. Never will be.

I have however grown to find a sort of numb middle ground of bland existence where everything is boiled and all shades grey. I have been dancing with depression in a place that isolates beyond the healthy dose for a creative.

There are places to see, taste buds to be brought to life, smells to be defined. There is so much wonder waiting to be discovered by these eyes that have only roamed in my imagination.

There is nothing for me here. Nothing but a stifling of my spirit.

I cannot live in this world without trusting even one person. I am not cut out to be the mistrusted outsider. I am not cut out to be hated. Tolerated, at least, but certainly not hated.

I feel like my life is on hold. Like I have pressed the pause button for too long, and the player has just timed out and switched off.

Enough.

I need to leave.

I am going to resign.

The fat lady has sung.